


Mors ex machina

by audaxfemina



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-26
Updated: 2018-04-26
Packaged: 2019-04-28 03:08:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14440158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/audaxfemina/pseuds/audaxfemina
Summary: When attempting to court someone, perhaps it's best to obtain permission. At the very least, know who you're dealing with.Not really a crossover, but you may run across someone you know.  :)  A fix-it before MCU breaks all of our favorite toys.





	Mors ex machina

**Author's Note:**

> Long time since I posted anything, first work on this archive. Got attacked by this rabid plot bunny last night and fleshed it out until I was moderately happy with it. Yes, Thanos' characterization sucks because let's face it, we haven't actually met him for more than trailers. Yes, I think it could use more work. Yes, I'm not thrilled with it. (I'm a perfectionist and I'm lucky I'm getting this out as it is.) 
> 
> But as Infinity Wars will render this immediately and completely AU, I thought it best to get out ahead of the release. 
> 
> A fix-it before Marvel breaks it. Enjoy.

Both sides had squared off, and well, it was a battle that Peter Quill was pretty certain they were going to lose. Drax was down, Gamora was limping, and Nebula was almost torn in half. 

It was, therefore, quite unexpected when a single, unarmored human walked onto the battlefield, a single sword strapped to his back. Unlike Thanos or any of the other combatants, he was slender and barefoot. He was dressed in form-fitting black clothing and his hazel eyes took in his surroundings with almost an air of manic glee. But it seemed as though time had stopped, with bullets and blasts in mid-air.

Even the myriad combatants on both sides paused as ash and debris hung before their eyes, not clearing as heartbeats passed.

The near-beatific smile on the man’s face made Starlord pause, confused by why a civilian psychopath was putting himself in the middle of the battle. “Um, why are you smiling?”

“I haven’t been on the site of a slaughter quite like this since the Crusades,” he answered, amusedly. “Ranged weapons changed combat entirely on Earth. It is right to face the one you plan to kill. It makes me a lot less impersonal.” He plucked one bullet out of the air and examined it before dropping it to the ground.

“Not really sure who you are, but this is super dangerous and he’s definitely trying to kill us all. So, whose side are you on?” Stark almost gasped, his armor rent and gaping in all the wrong places. 

“My own.” The man paused, quirking a smile that could honestly only be described as a smirk. “Or rather, at one point, you were on mine, Anthony Stark, before your… change of heart,” he answered, tapping at the billionaire’s chest. “Dear, dear Merchant.”

Stark actually flinched. What the hell?

“Oh, that’s… um, not super informative or helpful,” Spidey muttered.

The newcomer turned to face Spiderman then, an apologetic look on his face. Several emotions flickered over his face and he reached out, touching the younger Peter’s face gently as a father would. He rested both calloused hands on the teenager’s face and held it tenderly. “Of course you wouldn’t be anywhere else. In this time, in this place, in the ending of all things. At the day of reckoning; Peter Parker, this was your path all along. I knew that, of course. Your Uncle Ben would be horrified to find you here and yet… he would be so absolutely incandescently proud of you and the man you have become and will become. Hold tight, little one. It’s nearly over.”

The teenager frowned and squinted, trying to make sense of something. “I *know* you,” Parker breathed. That statement received a gracious nod and a gentle kiss to the forehead. 

As quickly as the care had come over the man’s face, it evaporated as he turned to face the mad Titan, squaring his shoulders in defiance. “Thanos,” he stated, English accent pronounced. “You shall stop this crusade. Now.”

“And who are you, that you would order me?” Thanos growled.

The man laughed hysterically. “Oh, this is bloody brilliant. For decades, you have screamed my name into the endless voids searching for my favor, and you don’t even know me when you stand before me.” He crossed his arms over his chest and waited for the penny to drop with someone.

Beside him, Gamora breathed one word, and the stranger whipped his head around. 

“Yes, my dear,” he conceded before facing Thanos again. “Your daughter knows me by name. Say it, Thanos!” The man’s voice lowered to an angry hiss as Gamora took Peter’s hand and held it in a bruising grip.

“Death,” the Titan rumbled. “I thought…”

“Didn’t you say Death was a chick?” Starlord whispered softly.

As the cool hazel gaze settled on him, he apologized. “Sorry.” His cheeks flushed a bright crimson as everyone looked at him instead.

“I’m a personification of a force of the universe, Peter Quill. That you ascribe a gendered persona to me is for your own comfort and not a constraint on my capacities. It simply aids your tiny little mind in perceiving me without imploding. Trust me, I found out the hard way.” He changed then, popping through a dozen faces before settling on a feminine form with a gray face and long blue-black hair. He/She issued a scathing glance to Thanos before asking, “Better, my Lord?” in a voice so acrid and derisive Peter thought the Titan might get burns.

The purple Titan smiled. “After all this time I have found you.”

“Who found whom?” the slender figure muttered under her breath. An expression most commonly associated with Gamora’s irritation came over Death’s face. “Bully for you. Now. As I said, it’s done. Put down the Infinity Gauntlet and release the Gems. They’re not yours to own. They do not belong to any.”

“My quest is nearly complete.”

“Your *quest* has decimated Xandar, destroyed Knowhere, and wrought more death and destruction that I have had to deal with in two millennia. Killing half the people on the planet Earth? That’s over three and a half *billion* people, Thanos. Do you have *any* idea how much work that shall be for me?” Death shook her head. “You honestly think you’re doing my job for me? My job doesn’t end when they take their last breath, Thanos. Until I guide their souls from their bodies, they’re not truly dead.” 

Peter cast his glance around the assembled, their fallen and Thanos’ army. So… they weren’t really gone?

“So. You now stand at the crossroads of two options. You see, I have very little control over fate and very little interest in the squabbles of mortals on any planet, but the instant you dragged my name into your little power-trip, you invited my intercession. So, option one is that you can stand down and we can negotiate. Conversely, option two? Everyone here will bear witness to precisely what true power is.”

Thanos got larger if that was possible, trying valiantly to remain intimidating. “I have not come this far to stop now.”

“Kneel before me and I will allow you concessions. Otherwise, I shall give you no quarter.”

Thanos laughed and tensed minutely, raising the Gauntlet. “I have the Infinity Gems. I cannot be stopped.”

Death rolled their eyes and sighed before shaking their head. “Alright,” was the dubious statement from the universal force.

Before anyone could blink, Thanos’ head toppled from his neck and his body collapsed to the ground, the gauntlet clinking uselessly against the stone. 

Casting a glance at the others, the once again thin-looking man wiped off his iridescent blade and sheathed it, before tugging the Infinity Gauntlet off of the dead Titan’s wrist. He placed it on his left hand and examined it critically before walking back towards Earth’s heroes. “Now,” he said. “Will the four of you continue this useless charade and join the…” He chuckled derisively. “Figurehead of your army or will you kindly go away of your own accord? The choice is yours.”

Before Corvus had a chance to move, he and Ebony were disintegrated, leaving only two of Thanos’ henchmen behind. 

“Anyone else?” he asked gamely. Death’s expression became a derisive snarl. _“Withdraw or surrender.”_

Proxima growled, but departed the field, while Cull narrowed his eyes and then retreated. Neither, it seemed, thought they had a chance against the remainder of Life’s forces when all the chips were down.

The silence that followed was echoing as Death pensively mulled over the Gauntlet on his hand. “What a mess this is. Someone definitely should have involved me sooner.”

“Where the hell *were* you?” Rocket demanded hotly before either Peter or Gamora could stop him. “This guy’s been trying to kill us for AGES. Between Ronan and Xandar and this-”

“Munich,” Death conceded. “Germany. Terra. It’s Oktoberfest. I can’t pass up a good beer, especially a Hefeweizen. The Sauerkraut I could take or leave, however.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Stark offered. 

Death smiled and turned to him. “You do that, dear Tony. This is a miserable day, isn’t it? That one is dead, that one is dead… you’re mortally wounded. May I let you in on a little secret, my Merchant? I can’t create life. It’s not in my nature. Can’t even create offspring like you can. I can’t bring back the long dead. That’s Life’s job. But what good is a rule that isn’t meant to be broken?” 

At that, Stark grinned. “A force of the universe after my own heart.”

Death touched the man’s chest again with his bare hand and Iron Man straightened up slightly. “I don’t feel like working that much today,” the immortal being replied. 

Across the field, injuries healed and the dead gasped back to life. Gamora dropped his hand to see to Nebula, Captain America was held by the Winter Soldier… the Sorcerer lifted his head from the ground and was instantly enveloped by his Cloak.

The personification of Death stood, expressionless as he watched the scene.

“Death?” Spiderman asked softly, advancing slightly from where he’d apparently been frozen by the spectre’s touch.

“Yes, Peter Parker?”

The tremulous voice of the teenager rang out in the open battlefield. “Thanks.”

Death smiled. “You’re very welcome.” He turned to Strange. “You know, dear Doctor, this is far too much power for any one being to possess.” 

“Agreed,” the Sorcerer conceded cautiously. 

“But, you see, even if I am a primordial force of nature, immortal and immeasurable, I’m simply one being. I simply don’t have the time-” he said, removing the green gem from the Gauntlet.

The Eye of Agamotto closed around it to Stephen’s surprise. 

“Nor the presence of mind-” 

Vision was restored, gasping in the arms of the Scarlet Witch as the power flooded him once again.

“To shape reality and space-” 

Red and blue fell out of the glove, bound in perfect cubes that ended up floating before Thor and Stark.

“And guard and care for all that power.” 

The protective sphere that Peter had initially placed the Power stone in floated in front of his face. He reached out and took it carefully.

“-When my business is the affair of the soul.” He took out the last, orange stone and held it in his hand, looking through its shimmering facets as they caught what little ambient light the battlefield held in suspended repulsor blasts and explosions. Death then cupped the gem in the palm of his hand, then made a tight fist and opened his hand like a magician performing sleight of hand. The stone was gone. With that, the empty gauntlet crashed to the ground and shattered into burning ash. 

Peter slipped the orb into his coat pocket and looked to Gamora who seemed to have a genuine smile on her face. 

“Well then, ladies. Gentlemen. Good work. I’ve got some mischief and a beer to get back to in Germany before my companion drinks it.” Sparing one last look at Thanos, he tutted softly. “You know, I’m not quite sure why Thanos was in such a rush to meet me. I find everyone in the end.” He turned back to the assembled heroes. “Do have a good life. You only get the one.”

With that, Death walked away, simply disappearing between one step and the next. No one spoke for a few moments until one of their ‘younger’ members decided to put his two credits in.

“I. Am. Groot.”

For once, Peter couldn’t find it in him to chide Groot for his language. That was… vile but accurate.

“Exactly my feelings, Groot. What the hell are we supposed to do now?” Rocket snarled.

Tony handed off the stone to War Machine, clapped his hands together and said, “Plan P: Burn Thanos’ body, secure the stones, throw one hell of a party back on Earth. Drinks on me?”

Spiderman grinned. “Yeah!”

“You’re too young to drink,” Captain America interjected.

The Winter Soldier just rolled his eyes. “Shut up, Stevie.”

“Arm-wrestle you for it, Rogers. Hey, we just saved the universe. And I know I need a drink. Or some Xanax.” As Spiderman kept babbling, Stark walked over and hugged the younger superhero tightly. 

“C’mon Underoos. I’ve got a party to plan before your ridiculously hot aunt decides to kill me. And you’ve got calculus homework.” Tony turned to Starlord and said, “I just got my life saved by Death. I think this might be the weirdest thing that ever happened to me.”

“Quill found out his biological father was a planet,” Drax supplied.

The billionaire simply stopped and blinked for a moment before turning to Spidey. “I’ve got nothing.”

“Finally,” Rocket laughed. “Finally, the meatbag is speechless.”

Laughter finally bubbled out of Starlord and for the first time in a very long time, he had the feeling that just maybe, everything was going to be alright.

*** 

He returned to the table in the biergarten and reclaimed his refilled stein with a small smirk. 

“Over and done with?” his companion asked.

“You should have found me far sooner, dear heart. I could have dealt with your pesky sister roughly as easily. Your homeworld might not have been destroyed completely. Unless you wished it that way.” 

“It needed some freshening up.”

“Thanos is dead, two of the order are disintegrated, the stones are dispersed again, and I saved everyone I could.” He lifted the mug and took a long sip before saying, “Your brother is fine, by the by. He still thinks you’re dead, given as you didn’t show up with Thanos.”

“Yes, well, staying in the Titan’s company decreases life expectancy considerably, especially after you’d failed him once. I barely survived long enough after I gave him the Tesseract. Of course, I ran for the metaphorical hills. You can see why I called you in.”

“Yes. Vastly misinformed and overbearing. Typical male ego. It’s a much quieter universe now. Though I think Proxima and Cull will cause some trouble down the line.” He paused and then nudged, “Your brother?”

“At this point it’s fool Thor thrice, shame on him.” The god shook his head and said, “He needs to learn to have faith.”

“Do you know what you’re going to do now?”

“Planet is destroyed, people are scattered, my brother’s our king… Haven’t any concrete long-term plans at the moment. You?”

“I can think of a few. You might enjoy them.” Death smiled, all teeth.

The god of mischief chuckled and then lifted his own stein. “To a job well done, Death. And to tomorrow.”

Death clinked his stein to Loki’s and then saluted him. “Live, grow stronger. Fight another day.”

**Author's Note:**

> Also, my tickets to see IW are on Thursday, May 3rd. No spoilers. Please. My arc reactor can't take it.


End file.
